• Need help from former MFS (MyFreedomSmokes) customers

    Has any found a supplier or company that has tobacco e-juice like or very similar to MFS Turbosmog, Tall Paul, or Red Luck?

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The Funny Pages

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Imagine

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www.SmokelessImage.com
60627_10151139611924792_1362220313_n.jpg
 

lilac7779

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And God promised men that
good and obedient wives would
be found in all corners of the
world.
Then He made the earth
round...and laughed and
laughed and laughed...

God made the world and rested then.
Then God made man and rested again.

Then God made woman at man's expense.
Neither God nor man has rested since.
 

Duster6524

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:tumble: Man, I killed this thread! :(

Maybe I can breath new life into it...

An 82 year old man marries an 18 year old woman, she becomes pregnant. The 82 year old man goes to the Dr. to see what the Dr. had to say about the wife being pregnant. The Dr. said, "let me tell you a story about this 82 year old man I know. This man went hunting every hunting season his whole life, never missed an event. One year he got ready to go hunting and grabbed an umbrella instead of his gun. He got to the beaver pond and saw a beaver, pulled up the umbrella and said pow pow and the beaver fell over dead". The Dr. asked the 82 year old patient what he thought happened to the beaver and the patient said, "I think someone else shot the beaver."

:ohmy:
 

Duster6524

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......YOU MIGHT LIVE IN INDIANA - from Jeff Foxworthy

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Indiana.

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Indiana.

If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, you might live in Indiana.

If someone in a store offers you assistance & they don't work there, you might live in Indiana.

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Indiana.

If you have ever worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Indiana.

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Indiana.

If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Indiana.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE Indianan WHEN:

1. Vacation means going north or south on I 65 for the weekend.

2. You measure distance in hours.

3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.

4. You often switch from heat to AC in the same day and back again.

5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.

6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events including weddings.

7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.

8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.

9. You design your kids Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.

11. You know all 5 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, road construction, & It's Hot.

12. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.

13. Down south means Kentucky to you.

14. A brat is something you eat.

15. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new shed.

16. You go out to a tailgate party every Friday.

17. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

18. You find 0 degrees a "little chilly".

19. You can take a casserole of canned green beans, mushroom soup and dried onions to any social event and always leave with an empty pan.

20. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your Indiana friends. (What's not to understand?)
 

Duster6524

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Jerry, a Cajun highlander from Rapides Parish in central Louisiana, was an
older, single gentleman who was born and raised a Baptist, living in South
Louisiana. Each Friday night after work, he would fire up his outdoor
grill and cook a venison steak.
Now, all of Jerry's neighbors were Catholic...and since it was Lent, they
were forbidden from eating meat on Fridays. The delicious aroma from the
grilled venison steaks was causing such a problem for the Catholic
faithful that they finally talked to their priest. The priest went to visit Jerry
and suggested that Jerry convert to Catholicism.
After several classes and much study, Jerry attended Mass...and as the
priest sprinkled holy water over Jerry, he said, "You were born a Baptist
and raised a Baptist, but now you are Catholic."
Jerry's neighbors were greatly relieved until Friday night arrived and the
wonderful aroma of grilled venison filled the neighborhood.
The priest was called immediately by the neighbors and, as he rushed into
Jerry's yard, clutching a rosary and prepared to scold Jerry, he stopped
in amazement and watched. There stood Jerry, clutching a small bottle of
water which he carefully sprinkled over the grilling meat, and chanted: "You
were born a deer and raised a deer, but now you are a catfish."
 

Duster6524

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Classes for Men
Note: Due to the complexity and difficulty level of their contents, each course will accept a maximum of 8 participants each.

Topic 1 - How to fill up the ice cube trays. Step by step, with slide presentation.

Topic 2 - The toilet paper roll: Do they grow on the holders? Roundtable discussion.

Topic 3 - How to fight cerebral atrophy: Remembering birthdays, anniversaries, other important dates and calling when you're going to be late. Cerebral shock therapy sessions and full lobotomies offered.

Topic 4 - Fundamental differences between the laundry hamper and the floor. Pictures and explanatory graphics.

Topic 5 - The after-dinner dishes and silverware: Can they levitate and fly into the kitchen sink? Examples on video.

Topic 6 - Loss of identity: Losing the remote to your significant other. Helpline support and support groups.

Topic 7 - Learning how to find things, starting with looking in the right place instead of turning the house upside down while screaming. Open forum.

Topic 8 - Health watch: Bringing her flowers is not harmful to your health. Graphics and audio tape.

Topic 9 - Real men ask for directions when lost. Real life testimonials.

Topic 10 - Is it genetically impossible to sit quietly as she parallel parks? Driving simulation.

Topic 11 - Learning to live: Basic differences between your mother and your wife. Online class and role playing.

Topic 12 - How to be the ideal shopping companion. Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques.

Upon completion of the course, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.
 
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