Older Folks and Vaping Back Porch - Part Seven
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Pat,
When I was younger, I thought of suicide A LOT. The main thing that kept me from doing it was my kids and the fact that they needed me. And that the people that would end up raising them if I was gone, were totally incapable of doing a competent job.
The main idea that I used to help me cope with sticking it out was:
Pretend to yourself that you already did it. It's over. All the pressure, all the depression, all the problems are over.
Then all that's left is a chance to start again. Why not see what you can do with a second chance?!
You have Ginny, your children, your grandchildren, and us to try to live for. There are reasons to try for a second chance! And there are things you can do to try to make it work. Whether therapy, calling for help from the medical community or from family (maybe even moving in with family?), or just little things like practicing gratitude for the little things (like running water, refrigeration, the internet, the simple beauty all around you, and of course family.
Why not try to start over? Pretend it's a fresh start!
When I was younger, I thought of suicide A LOT. The main thing that kept me from doing it was my kids and the fact that they needed me. And that the people that would end up raising them if I was gone, were totally incapable of doing a competent job.
The main idea that I used to help me cope with sticking it out was:
Pretend to yourself that you already did it. It's over. All the pressure, all the depression, all the problems are over.
Then all that's left is a chance to start again. Why not see what you can do with a second chance?!
You have Ginny, your children, your grandchildren, and us to try to live for. There are reasons to try for a second chance! And there are things you can do to try to make it work. Whether therapy, calling for help from the medical community or from family (maybe even moving in with family?), or just little things like practicing gratitude for the little things (like running water, refrigeration, the internet, the simple beauty all around you, and of course family.
Why not try to start over? Pretend it's a fresh start!
{{{{Patrick}}}} It's hard to imagine that life would be better for Ginny and Sofie and your family without you. PLEASE talk to your doc about how you're feeling. PLEASE. You've got a lot to handle and I don't blame you for being depressed, but there are medications that can help and who knows what else if you just talk to your doc and your family. Meanwhile you should take it easy on that leg.
Maybe a walker or if that's too wide for your house, even a wide base cane would help to keep you from falling anymore? Maybe we should all send you pillows. You could velcro them all over yourself. That way you could just take a nap if you find yourself on the floor. You can even have my old bicycle helmet!
Maybe a walker or if that's too wide for your house, even a wide base cane would help to keep you from falling anymore? Maybe we should all send you pillows. You could velcro them all over yourself. That way you could just take a nap if you find yourself on the floor. You can even have my old bicycle helmet!
The feelings I had last night were just me thinking out loud or not thinking. I know I can't leave everyone like that but I was in a lot of pain, mental and physical. I love all you guys and my kids and I couldn't do that to them.
I've read that people who talk about that sort of things don't follow thru and I'm no different. I'm still here and I suppose I am just going to have to live with being hurt again. It's not a very fun place as you can tell.
If I was going to do that I would've done it a long time ago. I'm not
I've read that people who talk about that sort of things don't follow thru and I'm no different. I'm still here and I suppose I am just going to have to live with being hurt again. It's not a very fun place as you can tell.
If I was going to do that I would've done it a long time ago. I'm not
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Anyone who talks about it is at high risk of doing it now or later. We always take things like this seriously, even when we recognize a pattern.
The 5 stages of grief and loss are:
1. Denial and isolation;
2. Anger;
3. Bargaining;
4. Depression;
5. Acceptance.
People who are grieving do not necessarily go through the stages in the same order or experience all of them.
1. Denial and isolation;
2. Anger;
3. Bargaining;
4. Depression;
5. Acceptance.
People who are grieving do not necessarily go through the stages in the same order or experience all of them.
I just hurt so much but I don't want to get stuck back in the hospital. Would rather just live with it at home come wht may. I don't think anything is getting better just slightly less pain. I can't stop thinking about how I'm feeling. I just want to go to sleep. I don't know how much more I can bare tho. Everyone is writing me saying how much they love me. Now if I just felt the same way about myself, but I don't. I don't want to live a life that around every corner is more falling and hurting. I hurt so much mentally and physically that it is just miserable. I start getting over one thing and another rears its ugly head. I don't know how much more I can take. I was able to stand up and use the commode. I am still not right from the lat hospital and home stay. I don't want to be there again, I cant be there again. I guess I'm paying back all the breaks I have gotten thru the years. I just want to feel better for more then a week but it doesn't seem possible. Here I go again on the pity pot. Why douldn't I jsut be normal for a while. I really appreciate all you guys concern but I feel it is wasted on me.1 week of good and 2 months of bad just makes it worse. I'm trusting that what I say here stays here. I don't want people to feel sorry for me. I eon't know if I can feel happy again.
I am grateful for learning. Thank-you and I hope that my God looks upon you well for a reason.
Thank-you for expressing your thoughts.
Thank-you for expressing your thoughts.
Lulu didn't say it first, but I repeat it for emphasis.
Elizabeth Kubler-Ross on Death and Dying. And some people cycle through them repeatedly, especially as conditions change.
We are all dying, some of us are just further along in the process. And none of us know the hour nor the day.
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I have that book. My doc told me to read it. I haven't been out of pain long enough todo it.
Ginny is going to have them take me to the hospital tomorrow so I probably won't be around.
I guess she can't take me crying all the time. I get an hour maybe 2 of sleep and the pain wakes me up
Thanks you guys for being there for me. I have no other friend but I have you. I dont know what will happen tomorrow but I can't take the pain any more.
I sure did not mean to take credit for that at all.
Edited: I don't post very much anymore because of physical difficulties so when I remembered this from college psych courses I quoted it from the internet. Sorry for the omission and thanks for catching it.
Edited: I don't post very much anymore because of physical difficulties so when I remembered this from college psych courses I quoted it from the internet. Sorry for the omission and thanks for catching it.
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That's ok as long as it's because you're at the hospital.
Which is where I've been all day. MIL took a fall early this AM, 4 broken bones. (She's 96) Just recently back from there, surgery likely tomorrow - still waiting on word.Wish us luck!
If I didn't say it thank you all for being there for me. I know I'm a PIA but thats all I've got now. I am in so much pain but I'm afraid they will get me in there and thats the last Ill see of the world. Not my idea of living. Constant pain and wanting to cry. I don't understand why all this stuff is happening to me. I must've ...... somebody up there off bad but it is getting bad
It would be great if they could sort you out with some excellent pain control. My hopes & expectations are high.
Sincerely hope all goes well. See you soon!
Sincerely hope all goes well. See you soon!
Awww Pat, we really do care. In many ways you've been such a valuable friend to us on this thread. We hate to see you having such a hard time. Something that crossed my mind when I woke up during the night is that sometimes antidepressants can have the opposite effect. Might be a good idea to ask your doc about the one you're taking? I'm glad to hear that Ginny is taking you to the hospital. Doesn't mean you have to stay, but you should be seen to get some help. Please let us know how you make out. Meanwhile, my prayers continue for you and Ginny.
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